Honestly, I feel as though I have to put some sort of disclaimer here that I do not just look for weird and “der” things in Florida, but it is such a fertile ground for all things stupid that these news stories just seem to be incredibly easy to find!

Again this one is from the land of social security and trailer parks – a woman….err I mean a man…ok a he/she was arrested last month for pretending to be a doctor; a plastic surgeon no less.

So that is bad enough right? I mean you can imaging some of the gross deformities that this fake doc caused in some of her patients, but the last bit of this story is what has me scratching my head so bad I am drawing blood.

It seems that this so-called specialist in plastic surgery was offering butt lifts for the meager sum of $700. First red flag, right?

Second red flag – well you have to look at her to see what I am talking about and, lucky readers, I have included two of her most flattering pictures. They required a super-wide angle lens I am sure.

The last and most telling red flag is her method of lifting butts:

Oneal Ron Morris (ok should I call her Dr. Morris?) offered a woman a butt lift who was desperate for a curvier backside. The procedure involved injecting cement, mineral oil and the sealant used in the fix-a-flat product designed to be used to fix flat tires. The injections occurred in the woman’s rear end. The wounds were closed with crazy glue.

Needless to say, this procedure caused the patient some pretty serious injuries.

Ok so come on, I mean really? You see a woman that looks like a man, with a rear end the size of the Goodyear blimp coming at you with a syringe full of cement and fix-a-flat and you do not run??

I have to blame the woman who asked for the procedure just as much as the quack doctor who performed this outrageous procedure.

In an interview with Entertainment Tonight!, Oneal said:

“It sounds bizarre, but how could America feel like a person would even put cement in somebody’s bottom? You know, it’s just these allegations,” Morris said. “I didn’t do any of these things to these people. Just know these people who are lying are ruining my life. That’s all I have to say.”

“They didn’t catch me doing anything. So they are just allegations. So I’m innocent. I really am innocent or whatever.”